Saturday, September 19, 2009

This Bullsh** is Getting out of Hand!

Okay. I haven't blogged in a minute (writing a blog, that is) and I may be a little rusty, so bear with me. Due to my exciting life in the suburbs of Georgia, I have lots of spare time to read different blogs and one that I frequent is Necole Bitchie. Yesterday she posted a video of a Tyra Banks episode featuring African-American women that had nearly died due to complications of botched DIY butt implants. It was rather sad, but what was worse for me was when I scrolled past the post to read the comments of other readers.

The two that stuck out to me the most were posts from what I gathered to be two African-American males. Here's a portion of what the first guy wrote:

"A woman with no bootie is a woman without my phone number. I do not care how much I like her personality, how cute she is…If she doesnt have a booty and some thick thighs….I wont even take her serious. Its that important. A big booty is a pre-requisite."

He then went on to list his criteria when looking for a woman and the #1 priority was (you guessed it) a big ass. Followed by looks, "good pussy," some other BS, then alllllll the way at #7 was intelligence, which made me chuckle. He went on to say that if any women fit his criteria and wanted an "educated" man, to hit him up at his e-mail address. *Blank stare*

Next was a young man whose screen name was "Real Talk." He said:

"Nowadays skinny girls might be a man due to surgeries and tranvesdikes. A big butt with thick, curvy hips screams femininity and says to a man “I’m a woman”. Black women are supposed to be curvy. Men dont want a girl shaped like a boy. Take money away and women would be just as choosy. Women are superficial with money so what do you expect. Once a nigga got money he gonna be choosy with the body of a woman (cause he can). Men buss they ass to get paid to be choosy, if you dont want a choosy man get a broke man. Real talk"

Really? I can't say I was particularly surprised at these comments, more disappointed than anything. It actually only confirmed the suspicions I had about Black men regarding thin Black women to begin with. While going to school last year, I had a roommate that had the body that all men seem to be looking for: big booty, hips, thighs. The complete opposite of myself, being a lifetime member of the "Itty Bitty Titty Committee," having little to no thighs, and a moderate sized behind. Every time we went out, it never failed: some guy would step to her spitting mad (corny) game and try to get her number. It baffled me because even though I'm not an outgoing person, neither was she so I knew they couldn't be talking to her based off personality. I thought maybe it had something to do with looks. I consider myself attractive, but after going out with her so many times and being completely ignored, I thought maybe I was one of those delusional girls that thinks she is so fine and no one else sees it but herself. I kept observing my surroundings and began to notice that whenever a female passed a group of guys, what was the first thing they looked at? Not her face, not even her breasts, it was that ass. Needless to say, I was (and still am) disturbed by it. You mean to tell me a chick can be completely busted in the face, be boring as hell, DUMB as hell, but somehow get a pass just because she got a "donk"? According to "Real Talk" and that other dude, that's exactly what it means. Sad.

What makes it so ironic is that these are the same guys who moan and groan about how there are no "good women" out there and the only females they find are gold-diggers. What else can you expect when one of the least important qualities you look for in a woman is intelligence? Women obviously are up on the game now that they can use their bodies to get what they want, so why not take your dumb ass for everything you've got? I won't lie, I have certain physical aspects that I look for in a guy too, but to say that I wouldn't even give him a CHANCE if he is missing one of those features, in spite of having a good personality and being otherwise attractive? I don't just pisses me off that the majority of Black men have such low expectations for women. Prerequisite. Hmph.


Freckles said...

I hear you mama...

These cornball as dudes are also hiding behind their computer like most of us on the internet. Literally they can say whatever but also may not be putting themselves out there. Hell what do they look like? A superficial as some ment tend to be I have seen them move past all the things that they think they want. That supposed "dime" is sometimes nothing but her looks.

I am a thick sista with big breast and thick hips. In all honesty I dont have a big ass at all. I have enough but it is not one of my strongest attributes physicaly at all. The other thing is that I am aggressive which generally gets attention. I like you see myself as an attractive woman and I have a friend that is very attactive and sometimes I have looked past but realistically... it doesnt bother me as much as it use to. I prefer to approach man sometimes as I like to be able to choose who I speak with however that is whole other conversation.

These dudes that have all the prerequisites are generally shallow and alone anyway. They spend way too much time saying what is all wrong with her and nothing on self. I am sure there are a few extra pounds or not enough intelligence or something... It is what it is but once you know better I suppose you do better.

UglyCleanBroke87 said...

Thanks for the comment! I thought the same thing when I read those comments online....they have all these requirements for a woman, but do they even meet the same (physical) requirements themselves? We'll never know because we can't see them.

Also, I agree with you that guys like that are shallow. I try not to let it get to me because in the long run, a dude like that would be no good in a relationship anyway...but it can be frustrating at times.

lmpettis2004 said...

Hey Girl,

I feel you and I will be talking more!