Pages

Monday, September 13, 2010

Stanmanship.

I know I said I was tired of talking about celebrities, and I am. This post is dedicated to the average folks who watch every move that their favorite celebrity makes, and literally worship the ground that said celebrity walks on. These people are what most of us know as "stans."

For anyone that's not familiar with the definition of a stan, allow me to break it down to you. The term was introduced to pop culture after the release of Eminem's 2000 single "Stan" about a crazed fan who is so obsessed with Eminem that he emulates everything about the rapper's lifestyle, including his volatile relationship with his girlfriend. The term now describes a fan that has an unhealthy obsession with any celebrity or athle
te. (Although it has gotten to the point that even reality show cast members seem to have stans now. Go figure.)


I have my own opinion of what constitutes a stan. I think a stan is anyone who co-signs with everything a celebrity says or does, no matter how fucked up or retarded it is. These are the ones that will tattoo Lil' Wayne's face on their bodies, or argue that Lil' Kim was only trying to enhance her features with that plastic surgery. TI got caught with guns and drug paraphernalia? "Oh, that's just The Man trying to get him," a stan would say. They use no logic at all when it comes to their fave celeb, and would probably denounce Christ if He were to ever criticize the stans' hero. When reading your favorite entertainment blog, you can always count on a stan to be the first one in the comments section in all their caps-locked glory, cursing the blogger that dares to post unflattering pictures or articles about the celeb that they love more than life itself.

I often wonder: How do stans function in everyday life? Do these people have jobs, do they go to school? What did they do with themselves before their favorite celebrity was internationally known? What personality disorder characteristic do they have that makes them so enamored with someone who they will probably never meet, and will never even know they exist?

I can say that I only "stan" for a select few celebrities, but even in my stanmanship, I have the capability to know when enough is enough. I used to ride or die for Rihanna back in the day; she could do no wrong in my eyes. Post-Chris Brown, however, I came to the realization that she was making some questionable choices, personal and style-wise. It got to the point where I just couldn't co-sign some of the shit she was doing/wearing.





^^^^This is the Rihanna I could stan for.




This........is not.



I suppose that would mean I'm not a true stan. A true stan would love Rihanna through thick and thin, in the good times and the bad. If Rihanna shaved her head and tattooed the world map on it, then posted a Twitpic, a true stan would comment, "0MG $h3 I$ $0 f@Shi0Nabl3!!!!!!!!!!!" <---------Because that is the required writing style of any stan worth his/her weight. No, that's not fashionable. That is insanity. There's a difference between trend setting and crying out for help. Stans don't seem to understand that difference.

Now that I'm part of the Twitter community, I can see the celebrity obsession even more. The other day, someone made the observation that people seemed more concerned with the Twitter "beef" between Soulja Boy and Fabolous, than they were with the pastor that was planning to burn the Qur'an on September 11th. A couple days ago, the "Team Breezy" stans were in their zone when Chris Brown's mom was criticized for her bizarre tweet that "Michael Jackson died so Chris Brown could live." I still don't get that one, but I won't even go there. I mean, really, people? Why do any of us give a fuck about the cyber-thugging of two D-list rappers? Why are you threatening to cut a bitch because she took C.Breezy's mama's tweet as another opportunity to poke fun at his bow tie? Are you going to get any further in life by participating in this foolishness? I highly doubt it.

I believe that stans, along with Crocs and the word "swag," should be wiped from the face of the earth. Not on some messy "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" shit, but very quietly. Like one day you'll read a blog and say to yourself, "Hey! There are no ignorant ass, grammatically embarrassing, crotch-riding comments about Trey Songz' new album." Or you'll go on Twitter and not have to worry about your eyesight being assaulted by stupid screen names like "@Rih-Breezyminaj."

Who am I kidding though? Stans are here to stay......at least for the time being. I guess I should kick back and get my laughs in while I can.

6 comments:

khaki la'docker said...

so on point... its effing crazy how someone can "love" someone so much and admire everything about someone that they know nothing about. They know the celebrity- not the person.

and :dead: at that fool with all them tats. SMH

DaBossBitch said...

All so true down to the stupid twitter names! Things are totally different though from when I was a teen. I knew ONE person who had internet access at home. I also eventually knew ONE person with a cell phone. Shut up I'm not even THAT old!

and why does Kat Stacks have stans?!?!?! #Jesustakethewheel

☻TABOO♥ said...

Loved this post. And ditto to everything u said. Its just pathetic at this point... its cool to be a fan but all this obsessive behavior over people who are (dare I say it) HUMAN is ridiculous.

MindOfACreator91 said...

Wow... Rihanna, I'm not a stan either then lol

I'm Alee. said...

"I often wonder: How do stans function in everyday life? Do these people have jobs, do they go to school? What did they do with themselves before their favorite celebrity was internationally known?"

^^^
* DEAD *

"Like one day you'll read a blog and say to yourself, "Hey! There are no ignorant ass, grammatically embarrassing, crotch-riding comments about Trey Songz' new album." Or you'll go on Twitter and not have to worry about your eyesight being assaulted by stupid screen names like "@Rih-Breezyminaj."

^^^

I have a feeling they're here to stay... Unfortunatley :(

Sorry for this long ass comment full of re-quotes. lol

Freckles said...

i apporove this post. Well said and I am so over most celebrities and I have truly been trying to get into the twitter craze but it gets on my nerves.